19/02/2014

A Retrospect Wednesday! {A non-book topic - The Birdie Musings}

 

Do you ever think about how much you've changed over the years? Maybe the world around you is pretty much the same; the same people and the same routine, but somewhere, in all of that sameness, you've managed to completely morph into someone else? I've been feeling like that.

And it's not a bad thing at all! I've changed so much for the better. I'm not sure exactly when it happened, but I stopped being someone with a penchant for selfishness, and became a grown-up (or, as much of a grown-up as I can be).

I know, it's weird for you all to think of me as not always being this awesome? No, not weird? Oh, okay then.

Anyway, I think it's weird. It's weird looking back and wondering, was there an exact moment when I changed? When did I make that leap into knowing myself and becoming a person I could be proud of? The answer, of course, is that I don't know exactly. I just know that it happened, all of a sudden, when I wasn't even paying attention. Like that first strike of lightning in a thunderstorm.

The year before I started university, is when I really started to think about the kind of person I wanted to be and how my choices affected others. I really changed my outlook and gave a lot of thought to the type of people I wanted to surround myself with.

It was a year of reflecting and it meant that when I started university I started with a new perspective. Gone was the pessimistic girl, still fumbling with her past and trying desperately to analyse every little thing. I had the chance to be someone new. Someone better. A chance I'm so glad I took.

At some point during university, I became optimistic and happy-go-lucky. I steered clear of drama, made extremely loyal friends and just relaxed. I stopped worrying about things and took each day as it came. 

Not every day was perfect, but I really started to appreciate everything and enjoy the ridiculous beauty of my life. 

I made more of an effort to befriend people who were shy or timid. I made more of an effort to understand and emphasise with people, despite whether or not I agreed with them. And I made more of an effort to go easy on myself.

I graduated a few months ago with First-Class Honours and it really felt like the end of an era for me. Because somewhere in university I found myself. I learned not to just 'glide by'. I met my best friend and people who I know, even if we don't speak everyday, will be in my life for years to come. It was where I accomplished so much professionally and personally.

I'm so grateful for my experiences there. When I look back, I know that place was instrumental in shaping who I've become. The things I learned there; values that will stay with me forever, birthed a whole new side to me. It's funny how one experience, or a combination of small, seemingly insignificant ones, can whirlwind into something spectacular.

Do you have a moment in time, or just a period in your life, that really helped define who you are? And, more importantly, do you look back at old pictures of you and wonder WHAT THE HECK WAS GOING ON WITH MY HAIR?! 

I know I sure do:


 



Allie is a Pimm's-obsessed reader, who dreams of road tripping over America, learning to surf & becoming fluent in all the languages of her heritage (which, sadly, does not include Elvish). If she's not reading or blogging, you can find her catching up on Teen Wolf, or reigning supreme with Scrabble/Mario Kart. Stalk her on twitter, instagram or goodreads.


6 comments:

  1. I think it's nice to be able to realize you're changing, especially for the better. I know when I was in high school, I joined an online book club that really changed and shaped who I am today. It made me a bit more outgoing; made me more aware of the world around me, and it led to my blogging and all that has brought me.

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    1. An online book club sounds so cool :D I've always wanted to join a book club. I'm a member of the FYA London one but haven't had a chance to go to a meeting yet! I'm quite nervous, but I think when I do finally go it'll really be awesome.

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  2. What a fantastic, thoughtful post Allie! Much like you, university was the place where I found myself and learnt some major life lessons about the people who I chose to hang out with and the person I wanted to be. I was so happy go lucky during uni and angsty and shy in high school.

    Jeann @ Happy Indulgence

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    1. Aw yay! It's great someone else had a similar experience. This is why I'm a big pusher of going to uni - because it really does help you grow as a person and discover who you are!

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  3. I LOVE this post. Like Jeann said above, it's so thoughtful. I think everyone changes somewhere in their life (hopefully for the better!) and while sometimes it's a gradual thing like you mentioned, I personally had a very specific moment where I found myself at a really low point and knew I never wanted to be there again.

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    1. I'm sorry you went through a low point (been there myself), but in a way it's kind of a good thing, isn't it? I'm grateful for the bad points because they make me realise what I really want out of life / who I really want to be!

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