26/08/2015

Is Your Own Company is Good Enough? {The Birdie Musings}




When you're home alone, you're just chilling out. But when you're out alone you're . . . sad?!

Firstly, and obviously, this isn't a book-related post. Because I'm a rebel and I don't play by your rules, Bookish Community. I DANCE TO THE BEAT OF MY OWN DRUM (or flail. Flail would be a more accurate way to describe my dancing style).

So, without further digression, here's my question: why do people pair being alone with being lonely?

If you're at home by yourself, then that's normal and not something people tend to worry about or pass judgement on. But the moment you step outside the comfort of your own home, suddenly it means something different.

If I don't have plans with anyone at the weekend, then I probably won't do anything. Maybe I'll run some errands, but that's about it. Which doesn't bother me in the grand scheme of things since I'm an inherently lazy person when the opportunity arises.

But why don't I do anything, unless I'm with other people? When did it become abnormal to do things independently? If I can't be bothered to cook on Saturday and I don't have plans, why do I order a takeaway instead of going to a nice restaurant?

It almost seems as though if you're by yourself, people automatically assume that there's a reason. As though enjoying your own company is something to be ashamed of and nobody would do it unless they didn't have a choice.

I go out. I do things. I socialise. But not everything I want to do, my friends want to do. Does that mean I just shouldn't bother?

A while back, when The Fault in Our Stars movie came out, I didn't have anyone to go see it with. It wasn't something my friends were interested in, but I was desperate to go because I loved the book so much.

So I decided, what the hell? and I headed to the cinema on my own to see one of my favourite books brought to life.

You guys would not believe the looks I got.

Honestly, it was like I was a leper. People actually stared and gave me the odd side-eye. At one point I even overheard a girl casually say to her friends, "There are so many people here! People who liked the book, guys being dragged by their girlfriends, and then all of the sad people on their own."

Apparently, I was one of the sad people, because I had gone somewhere by myself.

As bookworms and bloggers, a lot of our time is spent online, finding new releases and talking to other bookish folks from around the world. For a lot of us, our real life friends don't share our passion for books. Which means for things like signings or bookish events, a lot of people would have to go alone.

I was thinking about how I've never been to a bookish event, simply because I've never had anyone to go with. And it struck me how completely stupid that was. I've missed out on meeting awesome authors – and maybe even new friends! – because I didn't want to go somewhere on my own.

And there's no reason for it. It's just that society seems to have ingrained it in my head that if I don't have anyone to do something with, then there's no point in doing it. Which, let's think about it, is a pretty awful way to think.

Since when is my own company not enough?

The more I think about this, the more I think about how many opportunities and experiences, I might have let pass by. It's frustrating to consider.

So this is my mid-year resolution: once a month, I'm going to do something with myself. Not just popping out to run errands, because we all do that. I mean an activity. An actual thing

It's time I stopped relying on other people to have fun.

 Do you do things on your own, or are you always a bit apprehensive? What are some fun things you like to do by yourself?

Allie has recently been presented with a very exciting opportunity that has her smiling Joker-style. Though it may be a little disconcerting for her family and friends to look at, she thinks they should just be happy she's taken a break from moaning about how much Teen Wolf sucked this season.
https://twitter.com/allie_LBBhttps://www.goodreads.com/user/show/8969137-allie-little-birdie-bookshttp://instagram.com/allie_LBBhttp://www.pinterest.com/allie_LBB/pins/http://outofkoolaid.tumblr.com/